Very innocently and not in a vindictive or mean way, I’ve been told “she’s just a foster child”. For an example I’ve been planning her first birthday party and yes, I may be going a little over the top, but when do I not? One of my friends, in the sweetest way possible with my financial well being in mind said, “But Richelle, she’s just a foster child”. I’ve also heard comments like “You won’t have her forever, so why are you doing so much”. When people say these things to me, I really have to stop and think of where they are coming from because I know they don’t mean them in a mean way. I’ve done my best to understand their thinking so I thought I would explain mine.
Why wouldn’t I throw her the craziest, most fun first birthday party I can throw? She is a CHILD, period. Right now, she is my responsibility, which makes her my child. For any child I am responsible for, I will go over the top and give them the best I can. So she might not remember it… who cares! There will be so many pictures she will never be able to forget it. 🙂 I don’t know what her future holds and I don’t know how many birthday parties she will have. What I do know is that this year she is going to have the best birthday party I could throw together in 7 weeks and there will be a bunch of people there who love her. She is a child, and this is what she deserves… just as any of my friend’s children deserve. So please, don’t remind me of the short time I have with her or refer to her as something lower than any other child because simply, she is a child, period.
“She’s just temporary, why are you doing so much for her”. If we think about it, aren’t we all temporary? There is no guarantee that we will all have full, long lives. The time I have with Sunshine (baby girl’s nickname) is limited and because of that, I want to do MORE with, and for her. Think about it… if you knew a loved one only had 6 months with you, what would you do? Would you start distancing yourself to make it “easier” for when they are gone or value the time together and do all that you can? Fostering is similar to that. I hope and dream that when she is gone, I can still have a relationship with her and her family but that might not happen and I might never know what happens to her. What I do know is what she does 24 hours a day, right now and I’m so thankful for this time and all the memories I can create with her!
My goal with posts like these is to help educate. Before I started fostering, I really didn’t understand it and I know most people are in the same boat. I am an open book when it comes to fostering so please don’t ever be afraid to ask me questions! I love sharing about this crazy world!